Northampton Saints 3rds 1 - 3 Mens 2nds

Scorer: P.Lancaster(2),C.Hobbs
Man of Match: A joint award for Peter Lancaster with his superb attacking displays and Jake Hobbs for his fiery defence and all round awesomeness
Donkey of the Day: Antony Hobbs – way too much squealing at the umpires

We were a man down in the form of Keelan Ford who had had to have 3 stitches in his knee after walking into a kerb. However Harry Machin and Jonners were back. So we were a dwarf down and two muscular giants up – so looking good. 

OK, our dwarf is not your common or garden dwarf, he has magic powers and he is the puppet master in midfield so he was still a big loss (well small loss in terms of meters but you get my point). Plus our dwarf came along to manage the team in his pastel pink manager outfit, although the umpires made him wear a fluorescent jacket due to health and safety concerns that one of the subs might tread on him.
Despite Luke trying to wipe out the team on the way, due to his Mario Kart driving style, the Adders were up for this game when they finally found the changing rooms. On paper we were the better team but the Adders know better than anyone that the paper always lies. And so it did as Northampton were good and came at the Adders very strongly. For 20 minutes or so it was a tough end to end game with both sides having to defend strongly. Luckily the WALL of Negus, Jake, Ranj, Jacob and the new and improved Jonners were impassable. Gangsta-speak-Ranj even had a bullet hole in his chest from a fight that broke out after somebody looked at him funny earlier in the week. Luckily that pensioner is recovering well now, although her mobility scooter is a write off. Ranj took on the role of taking on their biggest, scariest player. Imagine a Viking - taller, gingerier, more muscly and scarier than Jonners – exactly, he was a beast but Ranj had him on a lead, eating dog biscuits by the end of the game. Once the containment process had worked it was time to turn the taps on for our midfield and forwards. Mad Dog was all over the place, calling for the ball and dissecting the Northampton midfield, Christian was his wing man and the two started to take control of midfield with Harry doing all the muscle work. Cameron Hobbs and Chris Korma then started involving the ginger duo and both Brent and Peter were starting to scare Northampton. It was another one of these great attacks that resulted in our first goal after we got a short corner that Peter delicately deflected into the net. Not long after Cameron Hobbs came up for another short corner and fired in an unstoppable shot to make it 2 up at the break. There was some brilliant Adders passing both around the back and through the midfield. The Adders were happy but not complacent.
Until, that is, Negus decided to shake things up a bit. About half way through the second half the Adders were in charge with Brent, Peter, Cam, Chris and Ant all threatening to score. However Northampton were on an attack. Negus cherry picked the ball beautifully from their forward, turned on a sixpence, went past two players and then all he had to do was clear it out of the D. However he smacked it at one of their forwards who stepped into the D and creamed it past an unsighted Luke Jones in goal. Now it was squeaky bum time and Northampton could sense an opportunity. Luke made the save of the century when he dived to intercept a well drilled ball. His left hip deflected the ball over the cross bar. The Adders got into a flap and had 3 green cards in quick succession with Ranj, Cam and Harry either pushing the ball away or engaging in a poetry competition with the umpires. How Ant didn’t get any card at all was a mystery as his post-vasectomy high pitched squealing got the game stopped and the Captains a talking to. This allowed the Adders to reset and rely on good old fashioned tactics. Jake tore the ball off one of their forwards once more, passed it brilliantly to Brent, who turned his player and ran like a spanked panther at their D. He beautifully pulled in all of their defenders and then selflessly precision passed a pin point square ball to the waiting Lancaster Bomber who took it badly, recovered and then with a 10 foot stretch, poked the ball under the keeper. The Adders erupted in joy as the pressure was off with only 3 minutes to go. Ranj started doing cart wheels from the sideline and 100% Manager Fergie Keelan fell off the ball bag. From then on the Adders just controlled the game home.
It was a great performance from the Adders, well done lads – ‘Ave it!